Being a mum is one of the finest, hardest, happiest, craziest, privileged and scariest roles that I have had the privilege of experiencing to date. The one aspect that all us mothers share in common is the unconditional love we have for our children. We would happily die for them and that, believe me, is not an overstatement. That umbilical cord that connects our child to us, although removed at the time of birth, remains as an invisible reminder throughout our lives of the indelible bond and connection we have with them. The physical cord may be cut and removed at birth but the invisible one stays for life and reels in our children to us whenever we are needed.
For 14 years Rizul was the apple of my eye and the centre of my universe. As a child, his arms were always looking to hug his mummy while in a crowd, his eyes would always search my eyes for that reassurance that mummy was close by. And then 3 years ago came our little miracle surprise who removed the arrogance that I had of being a great mother, for he showed me how much more I had to learn to be a more patient, more hardworking and more loving mother than I had been. Being a shock to the system was an understatement when he was born as he has tested me in more ways than one as a mother.
We mums sacrifice our sanity at times to bring normality into our children lives, to ensure their faces hold a constant smile and their eyes never well up with tears, to provide every bit of stability in their existence and to give up our dreams if needed, in order to fulfil theirs. And guess what, despite the sleepless nights, the wiping of their noses, the school runs, the repetitive stories at bedtime, the spitting of food in our faces and the demands of toilet training, or helping them walk or talk, or learn the alphabet so much so that we hate the letters, its one of the most personally rewarding jobs of our lives.
There are times when the loneliness of it all surrounds you and we wonder what on earth have we let ourselves in for. Or moments when we simply break down in tears owing to the fact that we feel we are doing the best that we can or are doing it all wrong, needing that reassurance that we are doing just fine. Yet we find it in us to get up in the morning, plaster a smile on our faces and get cracking in making their lives as perfect as we possibly can.
We work our fingers to the bone or try to go without little things for ourselves to make sure they cannot complain of having all they need for a comfortable life. And guess what… there isn’t always a thanks at the end of it all but we continue to do it all again and again because that all to familiar invisible cord tugs at our hearts and soul.
Today on Mothers day, I congratulate myself on perhaps not getting it 100 percent correct but never giving up in an attempt to get it as close to perfection I could. I will pat myself on the back for getting past the frustrations, the tears, the doubts, the fears, the inner screams and understand that I am responsible of bringing two wonderful individuals into this world who will almost be a mirror of me in some way and carry forth my values in their life experiences and interactions with others. What better way is there to live a life knowing this?
Darling Rizul and Rishaan, as I sit here looking at the two beautiful cards I have kept from you both on Mothers day from the past (Rizul when he was 3 with his handprints and Rishaan with his footprint when he was 3 weeks old in hospital) and realise that you both complete me in ways that no other relationship can or could and am proud to celebrate this Mothers day in a role of someone I hope you both will always treasure for years after I have gone. Thank you for this privilege that no one else could have given me.
And Happy Mothers day to all those wonderful mothers out there whose emotions mirror mine. May we all allow ourselves to bask in the glory of what we have done and continue to do for our children.
Last but not least I must thank the wonderful person in my life who has passed on the art of being such a great mother to me. This post would mean nothing were it not for her. Thank you for always being there for me mummy, no matter what. For never making me less important than anyone else and always holding my life in higher regard than anyone else’s. If I have been able to be good at the job of being mother it’s a testament to you alone. Happy Mother’s Day mum..